One Liners from Rejection Letters: A Breakdown

I had the idea to skim through this year’s past rejection letters from attorney positions I applied. Of course not all even acknowledged my resume or application, and of those that did I haven’t had one interview this past year. My interpretation of the “one-liners” is in black.
1) We have reviewed your application and found you qualified for the position listed above. However, you were not among the most highly qualified candidates. {The economy is bad, we can pick who we want, we can make the process so diffifult that we can hire only seasoned experts who are in their 50’s with 20 years experience and established connections}
2) The hiring official has selected another candidate for this position. {Don’t apply here again darn it, we hired someone, case closed}.
3) I regret we are not able to offer you employment at this time. {I have to put a human emotion in my verb to not make it sound as if your rejection letter isn’t a template}.
4) I regret we are not able to consider your application at this time. {Ditto}.
5) As impressive as your credentials were, we regret to inform you that we are unable to offer you the position advertised. {We are holding out on you, we know you qualified for other positions that were probably internal and we won’t dare refer you to the other agencies, lest you might actually get hired for a position you are qualified for}.
6) This is to notify you that our consideration of all applicants is completed and you were not selected for this position. {Thus, you have no reason to make a follow-up inquiry *door slam*}.
7) Unfortunately, at the present time there are no vacancies for an attorney position, but I am pleased you contacted us. { I know you are desperate for work, but we have a budget crisis and I am holding onto my position by the skin of my teeth}.
 
7b)Unfortunately, we are not able to offer you a position at this time. {See 7}
8.) Due to the large volume of applicants, we were unable to extend an interview to you at this time. {What?}
9) Please be advised that you were not selected for one of the vacancies in the ____________ Office. {Likely you applied for only one advertised position but I decided to rub salt in your wound to let you know that there was another one you qualified for–how do you like them apples?}.
10) The [hiring attorney] had several qualified and impressive candidates of which you were one…It is therefore, all the more difficult for me to inform you that the [hiring attorney] has chosen to go in a different direction. {I chose my mother’s neighbor’s daughter because I owe her a favor}.
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2 Comments »

  1. JD Underdog Said:

    Nice analysis of the rejection language.

    Callback=good

    Snail mail=bad

    For me, I’d rather receive no acknowledgement than a boilerplate rejection letter.

    • A Law School Victim Said:

      I agree.


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